My name is Tracy and i'm 26 years old. I live in west yorkshire and i am currently working as an early years support worker in a childrens centre.
The reason i am here is that i was sexually abused by my older brother who is 8 years older than me i was 11 when it started. I bottled it up for a long time but recently a few things happened concerning him triggered the memories off.
I feel so alone at the moment because i haven't told my family about the abuse i can't and not many people outside of my family know.
I'm kinda of scared of the whole thing and i hope i gain some advice and friendship so i hope to hear from anyone soon!
I understand how you feel....I have not been able to sit down with my family to talk about my abuse (it was by an uncle). I do not think I ever will be able to do that either. The only family I have told is my daughter and only because she was sexually abused by her stepfather and she was having such a hard time I just had to tell her so she would know that I DO KNOW what it feels like, etc. I honestly think my parents think I do not remember what happened as I was five years old. Well, I have not forgotten. It has always been riping thru my mind. I am 41 now. I only broke silence when I was 39 years old because I was totally falling apart.
I think the best thing to do would be get into counseling...maybe a group. Also, you can journal your thoughts and feelings and questions...anything...it just needs to get out of your head...get it out on paper just to help get it out. you can shred the papers if you do not want anyone to ever find them.
Please know you are not alone and if you ever want to write back please do.
Cris is right. I only spoke about what happened to me after many flash backs and night mare, when i 32. I found a great lady i could talking too, I'm not having much luck with doctors etc. I wrote everything down flashbacks, nightmares the lot it gets it out of my head. No one is alone on here.
