Just want to say hi, and maybe for someone to say hi to me. I feel so alone at times, even though I am married (for almost 16 years) and we have 3 girls and 1 boy.
A year & 1/2 ago I told my Mother about what my dad did, everything kinda exploded from then... to make a long story short, dad died last Aug 2003, my sister blamed me, then Mom got sick and died this past July. I have a hard time acknowledging what happened, and trying to deal with it all.
I hope someone understands, I don't always understand myself.
hi you have to start to furgive yourself because believe me you did nothing wrong.
you where not to blame for the abuse the abuser was.
you where not to blame for your father dying, he must have known in his mind and heart that he would have been found out sooner or later and remember he not only abused you he abused the trust your mum had in him as a husband.
your mum dying is again non of your fault you did nothing wrong at all.
I can understand though that you need to grieve for the father you never had and the mother you lost.
If your sister doesn't understand maybe when she has gone through her grieving process she may be able to see that not only is it NOT your fault but you have lost much more then words could ever say.
please take care of yourself i am trying to following havoca healing process and it has helped.
